As you can probably tell by the title of this post, today's blog is more a story about a friend. We'll call this friend "S" for the sake of her privacy. S is a perfectly delightful human being. We've been friends for the better part of a decade now. In the last 8 years we've been friends, our friendship has yielded some pretty fantastic and fun memories. Not to mention, I give her credit for bringing some of my favorite people into my life (you know who you are :)
The story I'm about to tell you is not one that is fun or fantastic. It was downright scary.
S is a perfectly delightful human being, as I mentioned before. However, she should come with a warning label (not unlike the one that came with Gizmo of the movie "Gremlins" fame) Instead of not feeding her after midnight, we need to remember to not let her get hungry. When she gets hungry, she get's angry. I'm going to call this phenomenon "Hangry".
So let me back up a bit. S was planning a baby shower for our friend who's due at the beginning of May. As many of you know, I have a reputation for being crafty. Since I'm at the age where most of my friends/family are having babies, I've gotten a reputation for making diaper cakes. For those who are unfamiliar, it's just a bunch of diapers rolled up and put in the shape of a wedding cake. You then decorate it with ribbons, toys, onesies, or whatever else you think will make it cute. If you go online and try to buy one, you'll find that they're kind of unexpectedly expensive. You wouldn't think you'd have to pay $150-$200 bucks for a really simple one. I enjoy this kind of stuff so I decided I'd try to make them myself.
Here's an example of the one I made for another friend so she could give it to someone:
S knew that I was planning on making one for the baby shower she was planning for our friend, so she called me up and asked if she could get in the action. I assumed she meant she wanted to pay for half of the goods. S doesn't exactly have a reputation for enjoying things that require patience. I was pleasantly surprised when she said she actually wanted to shop for the goods together and then help create it.
She arrived at our house before I even got home from work. When I got home, I was starving because I hadn't eaten a ton during the day. I changed, and immediately went to the fridge. This was not my first rodeo. I knew that we'd need to make a couple stops and we'd be out for at least an hour and a half or two. I asked her if she wanted a snack. She said she was fine. I downed some pineapple and we were on our way.
It all started out just fine. I did get the distinct sense that she was hungry when we walked into Target, she saw some sugar cookies at the register and screamed "O.M.G!!!! I LOVE THOSE SUGAR COOKIES!!! THEY'RE SOOOOOOOOOOOOO GOOD!!!!!!" I mean, I haven't seen her get that excited about much of anything lately. In fact, I'm trying to remember the last time I've heard her so excited. It escapes me.
Anyway, we head immediately over the baby stuff. It was clear that we didn't have the same artistic or creative ideas. Our friend is having a girl and I wanted this thing to be girly (think: pink...very pink.) She starts picking out lots of weird stuff (i.e. breast pump equipment) and I proceed to explain to her that all we need are diapers and some cute toys and ribbons to decorate it with. In other words, breast pumps are not cute. She then asks about shampoos and lotions and what not. While you can hide some of that stuff inside the center of the diaper cake, again, it's not so cute to decorate with. I was hopeful when she headed over to the bows and headbands... but she was immediately drawn to the Gothic baby colors (red, black, gray). I think this is when she started to become "Hangry".
It seemed like she was racing up and down the aisles like a crazy person just trying to find stuff so we could be done and she could leave and eat. The major source of disagreement was the stuffed animals. She wanted to get a lot of not pink stuff (a yellow giraffe, an easter chick, a really dark brown bodyless monkey security blanket) whereas, I was on the hunt for pink elephants or bunnies or puppies. I settled on the giraffe just to compromise.
We moved on. We were in the party aisle looking for ribbon and I couldn't find the right stuff. This meant that we would most certainly have to make another stop. I took a look in the cart and realized that I couldn't settle for the yellow giraffe and headed back towards the baby aisle. The Hangry One was on the phone and mindlessly followed me. Once off the phone, she realized that were back in baby aisle abyss and asked what were doing. I told her I didn't like the topper and she told me that I was being crazy. I tried to figure out how to soothe the savage beast. I even asked her if I fed her a sugar cookie would she stop being mean. Instead, I thought maybe narrowing the options would help. I gave her a few options that I thought were okay, she picked one, and then I got mean. I said "My gut instinct is to do exactly the opposite of what you say." I guess Hangry breeds Hangry. Afterall, you reap what you sow...
To cut to the chase, we got what we needed at Target and moved onto the party store, found some awesome ribbon, and the cake tray. S found some sour patch kids that got her blood sugar balanced and she became halfway rational. We went back to my house and the Hubs fed her. She rolled diapers like a champ, and to her credit, she did find a killer bib and some awesome stickers. She had to leave and left the rest of the assembly to me. In the end, the diaper cake turned out really well. S even thinks that we could go into business together & have a local diaper cake company. I told her I wouldn't go into business with her unless she's well fed. I think it would destroy our friendship, otherwise.
At the end of the day, here's the end result:
*My dad recently said he was going to start being careful about what he says, because it might end up in my blog... I sure hope that isn't the case, dad. Comedic genius like yours would be a travesty not to share with the world. Seriously.
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