It's a LOVE marriage!!

In honor of the impending Valentine's day holiday and the 5-year marker of when I met the love of my life, I thought it was fitting to dedicate a post to him. For those of you who know and love Sid, you know that he's pretty much the nicest guy to ever walk the planet. Yes, he comes in a menacing package...but really, as cliche as it sounds, he's a big brown teddy bear.

The title of this post might seem odd to most people.  Allow me to explain... 

I'm Indian.  My parents are Indian.  They have an arranged marriage.  Most Indian people of a certain age have an arranged marriage.  The concept of finding love... REAL love...and actually being allowed to marry them in non-dramatic, Bollywood movie-inspired fashion is like a mythical creature...a unicorn, if you will. In fact, I recall when my mom was diagnosed with Breast Cancer in 2006, I wanted to cancel my wedding all together, rather than postponing it.  We were getting married in Vegas anyway...there was no reason for additional stress when my mom was using all her strength to battle Cancer.  When I brought up the prospect of cancelling the big Indian wedding, my dad said, "Arti, are you CRAZY?!  You will have a LOVE marriage...we need to CELEBRATE!  It's a rare and beautiful thing..." 

It really is...

In a serendipitous twist of fate, Sudhir and I came into contact 5 years ago.  I was in the midst of my man-hating phase because I'd been dissed by a plethora men.  My parents were convinced that I was a lesbian, or as my dad referred to it: "One of those Ellen Chicks".  The story of how Sudhir and I met is long and convoluded, but the Cliff's Notes version is as follows:

Girl lives in KC | Girl meets Boy who lives in NJ on internet | Girl flies out to meet boy | Girl and Boy have a perfectly splendid evening including dinner & theatre | Girl and Boy decide they are better off as friends | Boy introduces Girl to his Brother* | Girl and Brother live happily ever after.

Our courtship was brief by most people's standards.  We started talking 2/15/05.  We met in person the first time 3/23/05, he proposed 9/16/05.  SG would have you believe that the velocity at which our relationship progressed was "cultural".  I disagree.  I think that when you know, you know.  Even some friends that were concerned that I was rushing into things...they ended up eating their words after spending any substantial amount of time with him.  Case in point: SG dropped me off at the airport in KC when I was flying out to NYC to meet Sid for the very first time.  This is an actual conversation:

Me:  *hugging SG and leaving a brown faceprint on her beautiful cream colored coat*  Sarah, I really think I'm gonna marry this one.  I just know it...
SG: Simmer down, psycho...why don't you wait till you're at least in the same room for the first time.

And now, SG is one of Sid's biggest fans.  It's hard not to love the guy...it really is.

Every girl has a checklist in their head of qualities that they think the man of their dreams should posess.  Ladies, listen up: Love isn't about checking items off a checklist.  You could take a man, give him all those qualities...but if it's not there, it's not there...You simply can't force it.

Sudhir has crossed off items on a checklist that I would have never even thought to construct.  He's the man who makes me laugh till I cry, and will tolerate me crying till I laugh. He puts up with more than any man should, honestly. He thinks that my annoying quirks are cute. He tolerates my OCD about symmetry, my shopping addiction, my inability to let him use vocabulary incorrectly, and my stubborn nature.  He doesn't push me to talk when I've had a bad day.  He's happy to sit in silence and just watch TV that he's probably horrified to be watching (think Golden Girls Marathon) He loves, without question, the people that I love.  He makes them his...he makes the effort...he's thoughtful and kind.

I often wonder how I got so lucky.  There are probably a lot of women on God's green earth who are more deserving of the treasure that is Sudhir.  But...he picked me.  I'll never understand why, but as my mom would say, "I probably did something really good in my last lifetime..."
 
I love you, babe.

*I will most likely never be able to repay my now brother-in-law for hooking us up. Although, I suppose if he needs a kidney and I'm a match, that might even the score a little.